Starting to live life on life’s terms

Hi everyone,I’ve been in SLAA for 19 months now and have just finished step 12 (am stepping up tonight – yeehaaa!).  Have recently swapped phone numbers and talked on the phone with a man I’ve met through a Christian dating website and am feeling a bit edgy and nervous today.  We talked last night and have agreed to meet up next weekend.  This is all totally new to me.  The compulsion to contact him, keep checking out his profile on the dating website and the emails is sent me is really strong today, but I know that I deserve better than that now, I do not have to behave like that any more.  What will be will be.  I don’t need to control and manipulate anymore.  When the anxiety and compulsion got really strong today, I made an outreach call to a fellow SLA whom, I knew, had been through something similar recently.  She suggested that I review my bottom-lines and put new ones in place to protect myself from the possibility of old behaviour creeping back in.  I’ve done that, along with some prayer and meditation and feel much calmer.  I’m really not keen on the old adage “it works if you work it”, but it really is true.  Newcomers – if you’re worried that this programme is all stuff and nonsense and won’t make a difference to your life – you’re completely wrong.  Stick around, do the work and get the miracle of recovery!  God bless x

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